The OnLookers

What will they think???

Have you ever noticed how often we have a "crowd of witnesses" when we are diciplining our children!
It has been something that has been standing out to me lately.

The parent needs to discipline for something and when there are people around the scene. Often the situation becomes a comedy routein for the onlookers. The parent roll their eyes, say sarcastic things,(directed to the audience in ear shot) while always looking to see how they are being perceived.
The child feels like he/she is on center stage and many times can feel embarrassed, belittled and confused about what is happening.

THIS IS NOT THE WAY TO DO IT.

It is not difficult to remove the child from the onlookers, to step away into a more private setting where the child can have your undivided attention and you can have theirs.

"Johnny, Stop bugging that dog!" (parent looks around) smirks, makes a wise comment
"that dog is just going to chew your hand off if you don't stop...Youre going to be dogfood boy" heyhey
Johnny either watches the "show" that you are putting on for the crowd... OR he ignors you because he does not feel you are talking directly to him.

SIMPLY take Johnnie by the hand and walk away, behind a car, tree or go to another room. There take a few minutes to tell your son of your concern and that you are asking him to stop. You may need to tell the consequences of not stopping depending on your child. This needs to be eye to eye with a "Do you understand?" at the end.
Ask him to repeat what you have said and go back to what you were doing.

I want to let you know it does not look funny (although you may get some of the crowd to laugh) or mature when you put an act on for others. Most can see through what's going on: that you don't have a real grip on discipling your child.

Discipline your child in the most private setting that you can find at the moment. I have taken children to the car and even into a corner of the room. Make sure that you get on their level and that they fully understand what you are asking. Get up close and personal and stay private! Keep you voice low.

This will tweak the whole process and you will see your child take you more seriously when the time comes.

It's all part of the job!!
Blessings
Marnie