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Tuesday, January 15, 2008

#26 are you a SCREAMER???

I remember it clearly. My friends' mom would come out of the house and SCREAM at her kids. I never heard her talk in a normal voice to her children...and the most interesting thing to me at that time was..they COMPLETELY ignored her!

Why do we feel we need to SCREAM? Are we loosing control? Are we being ignored? Are our children deaf?

Are you a SCREAMER? Take a minute and think about it. I have found through trial and error that SCREAMING is not the best route to take. It is better to get the childs attention..eye to eye...and make yourself clear and understood. SCREAMING is to explaining as slapping is to a spanking. It is done out of frustration and anger just like a slap vs. a thought out spanking.

So how do we stop?
First, you need to admit that that is what you do. 2nd you need to see what drives you to it. 3rd you need to set some boundaries for yourself. Bring the kids in on it, or perhaps a girlfriend or your husband. Give them permission to give you the high sign when you start.

Now take your feelings off your sleeve and remind yourself that this is going to benefit everyone involved. Plus is that how you really want to be thought of?

We SCREAM when people are not "hearing us". So how do we change this? You have spoken, warned, threatened, bribed, cojoled and no one is paying any attention. You are like a broken record that those around you have gotten used to. How sad. All that wasted energy! All that empty parenting. All that cement being poured into the wrong place. Yes we are creating a solid foundation that our children will expect and live out.

Ok now so take a deep breath and begin a new day. Stop, think before you speak/scream. Carry through....be consistent..get your childs attention. But PLEASE STOP SCREAMING!!! what will the neighbors think:):)

Blessings,
Marnie

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